How to learn lap dance

How To Give A Lap Dance That Will Drive Your Man Crazy | Pleasure Mechanics

If you've ever fantasized about mesmerizing your man with a slow striptease before sex, rest assured you're not alone.

Wanting to tap into your inner diva and mastering the art of seduction to sexy music is totally natural (not to mention incredibly sexy).

Foreplay is not only just a fun part of initiating sex, but it can actually be an incredible time to bond you to your partner — and what better way than by turning your man on by learning how to give a lap dance with the sexiest movements your hips can offer?

Men enjoy lap dances — but there’s more to it than just watching as you gyrate and dance. It can also be an incredibly freeing moment for you as well, and make you feel sexy and confident before you even touch each other.

But lap dances can also seem a bit intimidating, and that’s okay!

Those of us who aren’t skilled in dancing or have never given a lap dance before might not know where to start. But once you’ve got a good place to begin, you can have an incredible amount of fun learning how to lap dance and showing off your best moves.

RELATED: 5 Tried-And-True Foreplay Tips To Tease And Tempt Him

If you want to get your man hot and bothered as a special occasion or even as a new form of foreplay before things really take off in the bedroom, then lap dances can be an intimately fun way to initiate sex.

We know a thing or two about how couples can improve their sex lives and become better lovers, and sharing something as passionate as a lap dance can certainly make for an interesting evening together.

Lap dances should last as long as you want them to, depending on your level of comfort, your playlist, and the overall mood. While the cost of a lap dance typically varies at certain venues, it's totally cool to give your boyfriend a lap dance. (And if you want to charge him, that's up to you.)

One of the most common questions you might have before you start is: “How can I give my man the best lap dance of his life without seeming like an amateur?” And if you’d like to know the answer to that, keep reading!

How to Give a Lap Dance Like a Total Pro


Treat the lap dance like it's a (sexy) special occasion.

Lap dancing isn't an everyday activity, but a seductive gift you can offer your man for special occasions.

These days, people automatically assume that erotic dance is only for strip clubs and music videos, but it's so much more than that.

Imagine your lover being completely spellbound by your every move, quivering with desire, ready to follow your every command. Learn to lap dance, and you'll gain tremendous erotic power and confidence.

2. Practice your lap dance moves.

Long before you give your man a lap dance, start dancing for your own pleasure. Find a few songs that you think are sexy and seductive and then practice dancing to them, enjoying the way the moves feel in your body.

Ditch the mirror and don't worry about what looks sexy. Focus on what feels sexy to you.

One of our golden rules is "get out of your head, get into your hips!" Women spend too much energy worrying about how they look, what their lover is thinking and if they are performing adequately enough.

Take all of that energy and focus on how you feel. Bring the focus of your attention down into your body and notice the sensations of pleasurable movement.

Start with your hips. Place your hands on your hips and sway your hips left and right. Notice how your whole body curves in response. Then thrust your hips forward and notice how your spine arches. All of these bends and curves are crazy sexy.

Have a little extra flesh? Use it to your advantage and accentuate your curves as you bend and sway with the music.

Firmly put your hands on the arms of the chair. Sway your hips from side to side.

Next, find a song that you love dancing to. You can choose a fast, booty-thumping song that makes you feel feisty and alive. Or you may prefer a sensual dance to a slow love song.

Find the songs that make you feel most alive, most erotically charged and most ready to seduce your lover. Then dance to the song over and over again until you are at ease, moving your hips and swaying to the rhythm.

You don't have to choreograph a whole routine, just find a few good moves that feel sexy to you. The more confidence you have, the more desire you will build in your audience of one!

RELATED: 9 Exotic Dancers Offer Sexy Tips For The Perfect Strip Tease

3. Get your space ready.

When you are ready to give your man a lap dance, take a few moments to prepare the space.

Clear the floor around your most comfortable chair. Imagine your man sitting in the chair, beaming at you with love and appreciation. Make sure you can walk all the way around the chair so you can dance in a 360-degree circle of seduction!

Dim the lights if you can or flood the room with candlelight. You may even want to buy colored light bulbs to create a new atmosphere. It doesn't take much to create the thrill of novelty!

Create an atmosphere that makes you feel sexy, seductive and in the mood to dance. As you prepare the space, start taking long deep breaths and get yourself in the zone.

4. Make sure your body and mind are in the zone.

What you wear for your lap-dancing performance is totally up to you.

You can go all out and dress up in your finest dress and high heels, go out on a date and give your lover a lap dance as dessert. Or you can hide gorgeous lingerie under casual clothes and surprise him on Sunday morning.

Make it your own. After all, a lap dance is an authentic expression of your sexuality!

You'll be getting very close and intimate with your lover, so take the time to take a long shower or bath and anoint yourself with a scent you love.

You'll feel more confident and relaxed if you take a few moments to tend to your body before you present yourself to your lover.

Set aside all worries about mundane life. Ditch your to-do lists. Mindfully step into the role of seductress.

Your only job for the next stretch of time is to feel so good in your body that you cast a spell, seducing your lover into your pleasure zone.

As much as you are giving a gift to your lover, you are also giving yourself the gift of a time to feel sexy, fully alive and sensually awake.

5. Build up the anticipation — it will drive him wild!

Don't tell your man what he has in store for him, but hint that you have something special to offer him. Let him wonder what's coming next.

Start your lap dance in whatever style you prefer. You can put the music on and strut your stuff.

Or just turn away, look over your shoulder as the song begins, wink at him and start to move. Whatever you do, commit fully.

Trust us, he is not going to evaluate your dance moves. He'll get excited at the opportunity to take in all of your beauty and will love the confidence in your body.

Don't worry about getting every move right and just let yourself have fun with it. Your own pleasure is the secret sauce that will make your lap dance the most memorable of his life.

So own your power, move for your own pleasure, and know that you are giving him the profound gift of watching your gorgeous body dance!


Ladies, strip tease it out.

Start far away from him, and time your approach with the song so the last few moves are right on his lap.

As you gain confidence, you can even create a playlist for a multi-song seduction, starting slow and working up to serious grinding on his lap. But to start, pick one sexy song and know that you have three to five minutes to give it your all.

From far away, make eye contact with him and slowly start moving into your dance. Then peel away one item of clothing at a time — or leave it all on! You can even combine striptease and lap dancing, and he will love it, no matter how nervous you are.

If it makes you feel more confident, leave all your clothes on and leave the undressing for later. Or strip down just to your lingerie. This is your expression, so do what makes you feel best.

As you move, slowly approach him and then back away. Then move around behind him, lightly stroking his hair and shoulders. Let him feel your breasts and hair graze the nape of his neck.

Then circle back around. Your goal is to tease him as much as possible, making him ache to touch you.

RELATED: I Learned How To Striptease For My Wife To Save My Marriage

7. Keep it simple.

You don't have to go crazy with your lap dance!

Once you have built up anticipation, start dancing closer to him. When you feel ready, let the climax of the lap dance begin.

Turn so you are facing away from him and slowly let your hips sink closer and closer to his lap. Whether he gets fully erect or not, remember that an erection is not a full measure of his arousal. So don't worry about how hard he is.

Here are four simple moves for once you are dancing in his lap:

1. Start by swaying your hips left and right.

This simple move is surprisingly powerful. Add a little dip by bending your knees as you sway.

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2. Lower your hips so they are just barely above his pants and then move your body in circles in time with the music.

3. Try a pelvic tilt by thrusting your hips forward and back.

Give your hips an extra push as you move back to make your booty bounce in a delicious way!

4. The fourth move you can try is a simple bounce squat.

Position yourself squarely above his lap and then squat quickly up and down, bouncing on his lap without ever making full contact. This move is a huge tease and turn-on. Play with speed; start with slow squats and then bring up the tempo until you are bouncing in the air, just above him.

Glance over your shoulder once in a while and make eye contact. He'll want to both look in your eyes and at your beautiful body — the desire to do both will be a delightful form of erotic tease!

8. Remember to finish the lap dance strong.

When you are ready to finish off as the song comes to an end, turn around so you are facing him, straddling one or both of his legs. Then do the same four moves: sway, thrust, circle and bounce.

Facing your lover means that your breasts (covered or not, they will still be a treat) will be at about face level. Use this to your advantage, and as you move your hips around his lap pay attention to all the delicious ways you can tease him.

When the song comes to an end, you have two choices. You can settle right into his lap and then let the charge take you into making out (and whatever other intimate activities you have on your mind!).

Or, you can get up and strut right out of the room, leaving him out of breath and dazzled by your presence. Remember, you are in charge!

9. Give your sexy self a pat on the back.

Choosing to give your lover a lap dance is a very powerful step toward more sexual confidence, in and out of the bedroom.

When you can accept the fact that you are gorgeous and a worthy object of his attention, you start to forget to care about the little imperfections and instead focus on the incredible pleasure your body can feel.

Lap dancing is a gift for both of you. Your lover gets the joy and arousal of watching you dance, and you get all of the pleasure of feeling like a powerful seductress.

Remember, start the journey by setting aside time to dance in private and bring your awareness to how much pleasure you can feel just by moving to one of your favorite songs.

Once you feel great and are ready to seduce your lover with a lap dance, follow the steps in this guide and you'll create a potent pleasure spell that is sure to transport you both.

RELATED: 14 Dirty Talk Phrases That Turn Men On

More for You:

The Pleasure Mechanics are a team of sex educators and touch experts dedicated to providing people around the world with the tools and strategies they need to experience maximum sexual pleasure. Their books and videos offer time-tested strategies based on human anatomy, psychology and an understanding of the social nature of human sexuality.

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8 Moves To Give Your Man A Perfect Lap Dance

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You might associate lap dances with strip clubs and late nights, but that doesn’t have to be the case. Men like a little spice, even in long-term relationships, and giving a good lap dance to the guy you love can be an excellent way to show him how you feel and bring a little sparkle to his eye.

Of course, you can’t very well deliver if you don’t know how to give a lap dance, which is why we’re going to talk about the ins and outs of actually giving him a lap dance in this article. Below, we’ll cover the basics, including how to bring up the subject with your guy, how to practice and what to wear, among other details.

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Keep in mind that the finished effect will either be sexy or bumbling, depending on how much time you devote to getting it right beforehand. If you want to give a good lap dance, don’t rush the process. Instead, follow these steps and you’ll do great.

1. What to Wear

When giving him a lap dance, one of the most effective moves is to remove clothing as you go along. This not only ups the ante little by little, but gives you an opportunity to do something a bit different every once in a while, removing various bits of clothing in lieu of dance moves … or better yet, turning the removal of clothing into dance moves.

Wear layers so you can strip down. Of course, you can’t be dressed like you’re heading out into the Alaskan wilderness when you start, but there are ways to layer up without looking bulky or silly. For instance, you can wear a bra, a camisole and a sheer blouse on top, perhaps embellished with a feather boa. On bottom, you might consider wearing thong underwear, tiny skintight shorts and a skirt over them. That gives you several pieces to play with, which can really help heighten the effect of the dance overall.

Incorporate the type of clothing that your man finds sexy. More on that here. Get more hints in our article on strip teases.

2. Practicing Your Skills Beforehand

If you don’t know how to give a lap dance, this party won’t go very far, now will it? So the first thing you have to do is learn how. This is easily achieved just by watching YouTube, but if you need some additional inspiration from an expert, Carmen Electra has some great videos. Important moves to master are circling the chair, climbing onto his lap, and dipping down and back up. Of course, there are many others, but these will make a great foundational repertoire.

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Remember to play up your assets. If you’re small-chested but have a really nice behind, make sure that faces him for at least part of the dance, and run your hands over it lightly. If your breasts are your best feature, make sure they’re front and center.

However, you shouldn’t worry too much about your body. If you need a confidence boost, then check out tips to love your body.

3. How to Suggest Giving Him a Lap Dance

One of the key ingredients in a good lap dance is a lack of awkwardness. If things feel bizarre or weird between the two of you, it won’t be very much fun for anyone, now will it? That means that the way in which you bring up the subject has to be casual, calm and naughty. A little shyness is fine, but if you lack confidence, so will he. When suggesting the dance, put on a playful or rowdy face. Be coy, inviting him “into your chambers,” or to “step into your office.” Maybe turn it into a role play scene. Make it fun, and be confident.

4. Spice Things Up

Unlike girls who give lap dances in strip clubs, you’re actually at liberty to touch and take things further (lap dances work well for sex!). Lucky for both of you, right? Instead of keeping the requisite distance between the two of you, sprinkle a few extra moves into your lap dance, stroking your hand down his chest or up his legs, kissing him on the lips or the neck, and making full contact once in a while.

Check out this post about foreplay for more ideas. Of particular notice is dry humping, which is essentially what a lap dance is! Of course, you’re free to do even more than that if you want (wink, wink), but pulling away once in a while can heighten the anticipation.

Keep in mind, though, that the no touching rule can actually make things even more exciting in some cases. If you want to go this route, just tell him at the start of the dance (in your sultriest voice, of course) that he better keep his hands off you or you’ll call your manager. Then, whenever he makes a grab for you, simply take his hands and pin them over his head or behind his back, or make him sit on them. If you’re feeling especially frisky and want to break a few rules, slap some handcuffs on him to include elements of light bondage.

5. Making It Complicated or Simple

This really depends on you and your man. If you have a dance background or gymnastic moves, complicated might just suit you. If you’re like most of us, however, simple is probably more your jam. In that case, go with it. Slow and sexy is perfect for lap dancing.

6. Which Music to Play

Marvin Gaye comes to mind as the typical lap dance music, and while “Let’s Get It On” certainly sends a pretty clear message, there are plenty of other choices out there as well. Think some Usher, which has a faster beat but still contains plenty of innuendo. If you want to move a little bit more slowly, there’s a whole world of R & B for you to explore. And you can always let your own tastes as a couple dictate what you like: anything with a decently slow, slinky beat will do the trick. This post has more more ideas for sexy music, and these songs are great for lap dances specifically!

Remember to practice your lap dance with the music you choose. If all you do is practice along with videos, your timing might be off when you play the music you’ve compiled. Speaking of compilations, make sure the songs you pick transition smoothly from one to the next, without weird interruptions that could throw off your mojo.

7. Design a Good Build Up

One of the most important components of giving him a lap dance is a good buildup. You can’t just dive straight into a bunch of grinding and hope it will be sexy. Similarly, feather light touches and a little bit of wiggling does not an entire lap dance make. Instead, you have to escalate the action all the way throughout.

The best way to ensure you’re building during the whole dance is to design a routine beforehand. Mix and match your moves so that you’re always going a bit further as each minute ticks into the next. Of course, it’s okay to occasionally back off or slow it down, but the overall feeling should be of rising action. Think of a book or a movie: in general, each “scene” should be a little more intense than the last. A little sexier, a little closer, a littler more risqué.

8. Calm Your Nerves Beforehand

Sure, a little bit of nervousness is cute, but if your bashfulness makes you unable to, you know, perform, then what’s the point? If you find yourself too shy to truly make it happen without some help, have a drink or two beforehand. In fact, a night when both of you are having a few glasses of wine (such as a holiday or anniversary, when you’re likely to be celebrating already) can be perfect, because your man will lose his initial inhibitions as well.

See? Giving a lap dance isn’t as hard as you think it is, provided you take the time to practice and set everything up beforehand. Not only is it totally doable, giving him a lap dance can make your relationship a lot more fun and bring you closer to one another.

Consider saving this surprise for a special occasion, like his birthday, a holiday or your anniversary. It will have a lot more impact if he doesn’t know about it beforehand, so don’t tell him you’re practicing or even hint at the surprise. Instead, whip it out at a totally unexpected moment and watch his eyes shine!

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Private dance. Dance school Triumph in St. Petersburg.

Any dance is a conversation of the body. Private dance is the seduction of a partner. Tell us about your feelings in the dance, private dance is the secret of body movement, which is known to two. To you and Him, a little romantic performance for him is the key to his heart and it is in your pocket. Private dance not only teaches seduction, but also gives self-confidence, you will always be in good shape, learn to feel your body, and understand which “buttons” you can press to achieve the result you need. In private dance classes you will make a lot of discoveries for yourself and understand what you are capable of. At the Triumph Dance Studio school, you can learn private dance in a group or stage a dance individually.

    What will you do during your Private Dance Lessons?
  • Warm-up and stretching, development of the necessary flexibility and plasticity of your body
  • Acquaintance with the basic principles of work "in contact": technique of movement in a compact space, rules for transition from one movement to another, safety precautions and "rules of the game" in "contact" work
  • Studying the plastic, dance movements of the Private Dance (in front of the viewer, on the sofa next to the viewer, in the stalls, on the knees of the viewer)
  • Mastering the technique of undressing in the process of performing a Private dance (optional)
  • Training in interaction with the audience, contact management in the dance process
  • Setting up a Private Dance to your favorite tune, working with the image (staging a costumed Private Dance - optional)

- Age

There is only one age limit - from 18 years old, there is no upper bar

- gender

Group classes are designed only for a female audience, however, men can also take individual lessons.

- health

If you are allowed to exercise, then there are no restrictions for you. If there is a ban on some exercises, then you simply do not do them.
Remember that you do any movement and exercise according to your strength - no one will rate you.

- physical training

You can come with no training. Even if you have never danced, you can do it. Remember - "Grace is available to everyone"!
If you have already danced, it will be easier and easier for you to remember the movements.

What to wear

For the first session, you can safely wear breeches/leggings/tights and shorts, complementing them with a T-shirt or top. It is better that the clothes fit, then you will more accurately understand your movements, and it will be easier for the teacher to correct them.
It is worth putting on ballet shoes (dance shoes - they can be rag or leather) or Czechs on your feet, however, just socks will do for the first time.
The teacher will warn you at the lesson about the need to bring shoes with heels, skirts or any other accessories.

...go back

Tuition fees

Strip plastic training for beginners in Moscow

Get rid of stiffness and tightness, wake up your sensuality and plasticity! Beginner strip training
Development of flexibility and femininity
Excellent physical activity without boring fitness
Online lessons in a group of up to 10 people and individually
Individual lessons in a hall convenient for you in Moscow 10 minutes from metro station Ulitsa 1905 goda
Private dance staging for him

Become a student of our school and get individual guidance from top teachers in Moscow!

I want to try!

Get to know us! Watch the video of our teachers and students

Each of our teachers puts their heart and soul into revealing the potential of students
Our teaching system is perfect for adult girls who have never danced
You can choose any teacher as an individual mentor

High Heels clip by Julia & strip plastic

Yulia's performance at the contest in the style of strip plastic

Clip from Alexandra's MC

Clip from Alexandra with the students of our school

Why should you pay attention to this style?

Increasing flexibility, revealing femininity, increasing self-esteem and self-confidence - all this is plastic strip

Plastic strip or strip dance is the most sensual and feminine direction of all types of dance!

Distinctive features of this style are a large number of elements in the stalls (on the floor), tight-fitting and rather open costume, seductive movements. But don't confuse it with striptease! The strip is inherently deeper.

This direction will teach you to accept and love your body, to move in such a way that it drives HIM crazy, but without vulgarity. You will feel confident and attractive.

Increasing flexibility and keeping fit will be a nice bonus, because the physical activity in the strip is very worthy!

Why girls from all over the world choose strip plastic lessons at Ladies Dance&Mind

Not only girls from Moscow, but also girls from the CIS countries, the EU and the USA are trained with us!

Groups up to 6 people in the hall, up to 10 people online

Attentive feedback and technique correction. You can always ask a question and get a detailed analysis of the movements. In the online format, you get real-time video feedback.

High-quality and well-thought-out modular teaching system

Lessons are built in logical blocks, the material is given from simple to complex. Dance links are taught in blocks, that is, the same link is gradually and carefully analyzed several lessons in a row.

Professional teachers with more than 10 years of experience, winners of national and international dance competitions

Learning from an experienced teacher is much easier and more effective than from a beginner. Our teachers not only dance at the highest level, but also know how to explain the movements in such a way that even those who have never danced can do it.

Taking care of your health. Teachers apply knowledge from the field of fitness, as well as knowledge of anatomy and physiology.

Each of our teachers is not only a dancer, but also has either an education in the field of fitness or personal sports experience. This allows you to make the lesson program as safe as possible so that dancing strengthens your health.

Toned body as a result of excellent physical activity

More than 90% of the students after a trial lesson of strip plastics report that they are satisfied with the level of physical activity: high, but not exhausting. The back, abdominal muscles and arms are strengthened.

Increasing flexibility and plasticity

After 3 months, students who practice 2 times a week rise to such a level of plasticity that they can already act in clips with simple choreographic performances and enjoy how they look on video

A unique system of individual mentoring

Ladies Dance&Mind students can choose their favorite teacher as a mentor. The mentor helps to formulate personal goals and choose the best way to achieve, and also supports on the way. You can always ask for feedback or advice from a teacher in a convenient messenger and get individual recommendations in order to move towards your goal as quickly as possible!

Answers to frequently asked questions about strip plastic lessons at the Ladies Dance&Mind 9 school0029

Find the answer to your question here!


Who are our classes for?


For all girls who want to relax, develop sensuality, learn how to move beautifully, form a beautiful and flexible body. Level of training - any!


What does a strip plastic lesson consist of?


1) warm-up with elements of strength and functional training to strengthen the necessary muscles, stretching elements for performing stunts
2) Practicing the basic elements of strip dance
3) Learning dance combinations and strip dances


How much do the lessons cost?


You can find the full price list here


Where and when are classes held?


Group classes - in a spacious hall 10 minutes walk from metro station Ulitsa 1905 Goda, as well as online on the ZOOM platform. The current schedule is here.

Individual - we rent a room in a place convenient for you, at a time convenient for you (by agreement with the teacher), individual lessons are also possible online.


What should I wear to class?


Comfortable sportswear that does not restrict movement, socks, heels at will. For the execution of parterre elements, knee pads are required.


I dream of doing a lap dance for him, but I'm a beginner. Is it possible?


Of course! Girls who regularly attend group classes at our school learn dance and, if desired, participate in the filming of the video solo or in a group. If you're worried that you won't be able to dance live, then you can give him a video of your dance!

If you want to quickly stage a private dance for him, taking into account all your wishes - we have a dance staging service, the cost is from 7000 rubles, depending on the number of individual lessons.

Feedback from our students about the lessons of strip plastics

Our teachers strip plastics

Learn from professionals!

Alexandra Mironova

Teacher of the Ladies Dance&Mind dance school in strip, latina solo, stretching, yoga. Professional artist and dancer, choreographer, dance teacher with more than 10 years of experience.

Alexandra is a master of staging bright dance numbers, an attentive and at the same time demanding teacher. Works with both beginners and those who continue their journey in dance.

Here is a partial list of Alexandra's victories at prestigious dance competitions and festivals:

  • silver medalist of international festivals: Scarab 2012, Oasis dance 2013, Magic ORTO 2013
  • gold medalist of the Cappuccino Festival 2017 in the EXOTIC DANCE nomination.
  • silver medalist, audience award - the international festival "Live Lights" (St. Petersburg, 2013) - Fire show
  • title "Miss Living Lights" St. Petersburg, 2015

Alexandra: "I see creativity as my main mission. To create a fairy tale, to bring beauty and joy to people is the highest happiness for me! If you have any creative idea - put dance for your loved one, stir up a crazy flash mob, creatively cut a T-shirt . .. - I will help you to realize it with joy and enthusiasm!"

Julia Tsvetkova

Dance teacher at the Ladies Dance&Mind dance school in the direction of strip plastic. Author of an online course on high heels. Dance experience over 10 years. Creator of his own dance team and winner of All-Russian competitions.

Julia - winner and prize -winner of prestigious dance competitions:

  • Fame Your Choreo,
  • Project 818 and other less well -known competitions

as well as Julia: