How to do a strip dance for your wife
How To Give A Striptease / Lap Dance For Your Woman
Welcome to the complete beginners guide for men who wish the learn how to give their wife / girlfriend / whoever… a sexy striptease and lap dance in private!
If you want to ignite that spark in your relationship, or add a new bedroom skill for future dates, then you’re seriously in luck.
There’s a lot of bad information out there on the internet, with many false fact’s and misleading instructions.
I’m not joking – the amount of bad information out there is insane! And I don’t want YOU to get the wrong advice.
So If you want accurate information regarding how to give your woman a striptease, backed by my own personal experience as a male stripper – then keep reading!
So giving an authentic lap dance for your woman is not as easy as one may think. Simply put – the more effort you put into practice, preparation and appearance, the more effective this skill will be.
Don’t think for 1 minute you can spend a few hours and come up with something that will blow her away – you’re kidding yourself.
To seduce your wife / girlfriend with a lap dance requires you to fully commit to the idea of seduction, and to invest time into planning how it’s all going down on the night.
Follow my beginners tutorial on lap dancing your woman below – and you’ll have a much better chance at success!
Choosing Your Striptease Song/s
Obviously we’re going to be lap dancing to music, but the more important questions are what song/s? How many songs? What genre should I choose?
My first piece of advice to choose something that she will enjoy listening to, however also consider if you feel comfortable dancing to it. It’s very important that you strip to something she actually likes and also something you’re able to get emotionally connected to whilst performing the striptease.
If you and your woman both listen and enjoy music that’s highly not appropriate for performing a striptease, such as heavy metal or classical music, then my suggestion is slow R’n’B music. Especially the R’n’B music from the 90’s and early 2000’s.
Think About What You Will Wear During The Lap Dance.
So there’s 2 options for you. You either use a costume or not. It’s entirely up to you. There’s no wrong answer here, just your personal preference.
Would you feel comfortable giving your woman a striptease in a police uniform? Or a Builder Outfit? Or even dressed like an army soldier? If the answer is yes, and you can also envision your woman being into the ‘role play’ aspect, then i highly recommend it.
It’s a great way for both of you to get ‘caught in the moment’ and really embrace the experience of of striptease.On the other hand – If you decide costumes aren’t your thing. Thats ok! A lap dance can be just as effective in your own clothes – so long as you dress appropriately and don’t look like you just woke up! The casual clothes appearance can be a great addition to ‘take her by surprise’ and bust out a lap dance without her knowing.
Where Will You Give The Lap Dance?
Your room set up, and how much space you allocate for yourself is very important.
Preparation is key.
Knowing your environment, the space you have to work with, the lighting, floor surface and chair (for her to sit on) is all crucial.
You’ll need adequate space to give her a lap dance and show her some of your male stripper dance moves, please do not try an attempt a lap dance in a confined, crowded or messy space. There’s nothing worse than knocking over some ornaments, or even slipping on a rug whilst dancing. It’s going to 100% kill the mood in the room immediately.
Please take the time to plan where you will do the lap dance, then clean the room and move around furniture to allocate space if need be.
We talk more about room preparation,space and most importantly, the lighting, in our lap dance masterclass online course.
Planning Your Striptease
Please don’t play your favourite track and cross your fingers and hope for the best. That’s why i’m here! To help you!
You should give yourself some form of structure to your show. Now let me be clear – i’m not suggesting your choreograph everything you do. In fact, I don’t recommend that. Why? Because choreographing dance moves for a TikTok video is 1 thing, but lap dancing is a whole different universe.
The emotional (and physical) connections you need to make with your partner whilst lap dancing require you to be ‘present in the moment’ and also constantly aware of her movements and reactions.Lap dancing It’s a 2 way process, on the other side, choreographing a dance routine for an audience is a 1 way process.
A dance routine is simply delivering your show to an audience who just watches it, that’s it. A lap dance is you delivering a show to someone you have an emotional connection with, in which they will receive your advances and react in response to your actions.
A good lap dance should be a 2 way process, 2 people connecting and feeding off each others ‘energy’.
Having said that, this is why you shouldn’t choreograph everything. Your lap dance will become stiff, rehearsed and lack any sort of passion. It will become a 1 way process.
In order to achieve a lap dance experience with 2 individuals immersed in each others presence, we need to allow us time to improvise and flow with the ‘moment’.
This is where my ‘anchor point’ system is so important. It’s a full proof system that will give structure to your show (so it still looks professional and clean) – whilst still giving you opportunity to interact with your partner however you like.
The anchor point planning system was designed to give ordinary, everyday men who can’t learn or remember choreography, the chance to put on a show without having to remember tedious amounts of dance steps and positions.
In our online course, we teach the fundamentals of sexy body movements, along with lap dance moves / tricks and finally masculine dance moves.
Make sure you know exactly what your plan is when performing a striptease for your woman
How To Initiate The Striptease?
Actually starting the show, or even bringing up the idea – can be more difficult than you may realise. For some it may come easy, but for others, it may present a problem.
Sure – you can just blurt it out like an impatient 6 year old waiting for the film to begin, or, you can subtly suggest the idea, leaving a thought of the concept in her mind, so she can ponder on it and let it grow into a desire of her own.
This is the optimal method of transitioning into the lap dance, it should be something both individuals eventually desire.
There are some great methods you can apply when smoothly hinting the idea of a lap dance. First of all, I suggest only doing the striptease when she is relaxed, in a good mood and is feeling appreciated. For this reason setting up the night with a dinner date is a fantastic idea. Proceeding this, a gift can also make your woman feel loved, thus more likely to receive the lap dance wholly.
Those are just a few example of how to approach the situation of a striptease show.
So I hope you’ve learnt a few new things, and these steps has you moving in the right direction. Yes I know I didn’t cover everything – but this is just a beginners guide, ok?
It’s designed to give you a little more clarity around the situation.
If this is something you’re looking to move forward with more seriously, I highly suggest you check out the ‘Lapdance Masterclass’ – It’s a complete online course packed full of video tutorials on how to give the best lap dance of your life.
We are giving away a FREE 5 day trial, so make sure to check that out!
Your author Tommy ‘Gun’ Harvey is the founder of Male Stripper Academy. An international training organisation committed to developing the highest standard of male strippers world-wide. Tommy has been heavily involved in the male stripping industry for over 8 years, he has toured around the world with internationally acclaimed male revues, worked in Las Vegas and currently runs his own agency in Gold Coast, Australia.
How To Do A Sexy Lap Dance
In marriage, it can be easy to get bored with the intimate side of our relationship. We need to find ways constantly to keep things new and fresh. Being able to relax and enjoy ourselves in the bedroom makes for a more enjoyable relationship all around. While there are lots of different ways to keep things fresh in the bedroom, the one that we will explore today is a sexy lap dance!
Confidence is Key
Confidence is sexy. So, whatever you’re doing, do it confidently! No matter how silly you may feel, be confident, and that will translate to your spouse. Be creative, but if being creative is too hard, turn to someone to be creative for you! For instance, on our app we have tons of different date ideas and even bedroom games, as do Keelie and Austin from Love Hope Adventure. Find something fun to do, and then do it with confidence!
The lap dance is one of those things that you just need to be sure to do confidently. It can feel a little awkward at first, and you may not know exactly what to do. Perhaps you just really haven’t ever seen a sexy lap dance given, and don’t know where to even start. But a lap dance is something that can bring fire into the bedroom and your relationship. Keelie and Austin are so amazing that they gave us some steps and ideas on how to make this sexy lap dance happen!
There are a few things you want to have ready before you jump into your sexy lap dance. Think about where in your home is the best and most appropriate place for you to give this sexy lap dance and set the mood. Consider making some low lighting with candles, a bedside lamp, or white Christmas lights. Grab a soft blanket to lay on the chair you use for the lap dance to make it nice and cozy. Maybe spritz a little bit of your favorite perfume around the room or burn a nice smelling candle to add to the ambiance.
Make sure you find something good to wear. You want to feel confident in whatever outfit you choose. Being able to move around in the outfit you choose is going to be extremely important. You may want to wear some lingerie or just a sexy outfit. Maybe there is something that your spouse absolutely loves to see you in, that could be the perfect outfit for this sexy lap dance. Move around a little in the outfit you choose before bringing your spouse in to make sure that it is going to work and make any necessary changes ahead of time.
Step 1: Get A Chair
The first step and tip that Keelie gave us was to grab a chair. Get something that you can work with. Try to make sure it doesn’t have any arms, doesn’t rock, and preferably doesn’t have wheels either. A simple chair is best here as it will allow you to move around it and be able to touch your spouse from every angle.
Check the height of the chair ahead of time to be sure that it’s not too tall and not too short. Depending on who is giving the lap dance, you may need a different chair, and that is just fine. Just know what’s going to work the best for you, and have it ready to go for your sexy lap dance. Getting into it, you definitely want to be prepared and keep the equipment simple. So don’t try to make it too crazy!
Step 2: Pick A Song
You’ve got to have music on to give a proper lap dance, of course! Pick something you like, something that you can easily move to. Try not to make the song too fast or too slow. You will naturally move to the beat and tempo of the music. It works the same as running music- you match the pace of the song you are listening to. If it is too fast, you will be bouncing around and this can kill the mood. Too slow and you will start moving too slow as well, which can just get annoying.
Make sure that whatever you choose isn’t something you will feel the need to sing along to. Singing along to a song is something else that can quickly kill the mood. There are times when singing can add to the experience, but for the most part, you will want to avoid this so as to not make your lap dance less sexy.
Step 3: Start Behind Them
Start behind your spouse! Starting in the back will give you an advantage and time to get warmed up. You can start to feel good about the moves you’re doing and test out a few things without any eyes on you. Get going and make sure you feel good about what you’re doing and how you’re moving before making your way to the front of the chair.
Be sure to be touching your spouse while you are warming up behind them. They will love this! Your warm up is a teaser for them, starting to get them very excited for when you make your way around to the front. Be super hands on. You will start to feel from them the things you are doing that they really like, and be able to have that influence the moves you do as you continue your lap dance.
Step 4: Walk Around Slowly
Slow and steady wins the race when it comes to a lap dance. Take your time working around the sides of the chair and your spouse and hang out there for a minute, letting your spouse enjoy you being next to them. Be hands on here again and really give them something to look forward to as you work your way around the chair. Finally, come on around to the front of the chair. This is when things really start to get spicy!
Whatever you do doesn’t have to look sexy in your mind. At this point, your spouse is just simply going to be floored that you are even doing this for them. They won’t care if you look super sexy at that moment. They just love that you are trying this out! Again, remember, confidence is sexy. So whatever you do, just do it confidently!
Step 5: Basic Moves
There are a few basic moves that comprise any sexy lap dance. Try a few of them out to make sure things go smoothly and you’re both enjoying yourselves!
- Bend over in front of your spouse
- Lean into your spouse
- Lean away from your spouse
- Give your spouse a good rub down (not necessarily just with your hands ;))
- Kiss your spouse all over
Try out these moves and any others you would like to experiment with. Get creative. You never know what will feel good to you and what will help your spouse really enjoy the lap dance you’re working so hard to give them.
Fun For All
Something that is super great about this, is that sexy lap dances do not have to be performed solely by the woman in the relationship. It is just as much fun for the man to perform the lap dance for his wife, and the wife will absolutely love it! So don’t be afraid to both try out these steps. Get creative with it. Once you’re feeling a little more comfortable with your lap dance, start adding in a few things that fit with your personality. Make it individual, unique. After all, this is a lap dance that only you can give!
Perhaps you will want to consider practicing ahead of time. You have all the steps now to make a great lap dance, but if you’ve never tried it, you may feel extra awkward in the moment. Take some time to try out any moves you think could be fun around the chair you pick in your sexy outfit or lingerie. And when it is time to do this with your spouse, take control of the moment. You’re in charge of where they sit, what you do, and for how long it goes. Enjoy this power and use it well!
Love, Hope, Adventure
Keelie and Austin Reason are the wonderful couple who gave us these tips today on how to do a sexy lap dance. They run a great company called Love Hope Adventure. You can check them out here for more tips and tricks, date ideas, and more: lovehopeadventure.com
Love Hope Adventure
Like what you heard? Be sure to listen to the full podcast episode here! And be sure to download the Intimately Us app, the fun and sexy app for your marriage! It’s full of games, connecting activities, and ideas to increase connection and pleasure in the bedroom.
Love this article?
Try this fun and sexy app for your marriage!
Get it on iPhone Get it on Android
I love this app! My husband and I are such busy people, this helps us stop and make sure we show the love that we have for each other. I’d give 6 stars if I could!
D & R
This is by far the #1 sex app for Christian couples! My wife and I played the games like 5 times over the last week. Sparks are flying and we’ve never felt so close before. Thank you!
C & L
Hi there, my name is Jaina (pronounced like Jay-Nuh) and I am so happy to be here! I am an outdoor enthusiast and love doing everything with my hubby and 3 dogs. I focus a lot on fertility in my own life and am learning to help other couple's on their intimacy journeys while struggling with infertility. I have a degree in psychology and absolutely LOVE helping others discover their greatness!
← Previous Post Next Post →
Striptease lesson: how to make a spicy gift - Relationships
Striptease as a gift is controversial. Someone will be delighted with such a present, and someone will be shocked. Experts told which men would appreciate a spicy gift, and also gave advice and basic lessons on how to prepare a private dance on your own and how to create an appropriate atmosphere for home striptease.
From Western films, we clearly understood - a striptease as a gift will please any man. Yes, and a woman, if we are talking about a private dance, performed by a man. Ladies even take strip dancing lessons themselves to surprise their beloved at home, and expect such a foreplay to be appreciated and received with gratitude. But in real life is not so clear cut.
It turns out that some people don't want to receive street music as a present, and it doesn't matter who performs it. Especially if outsiders are present during the dance. Psychologists warn that a stripper is a gift to a man who experiences any kind of sexual complex. sphere, will only remind him of the problem. Therefore, it is important to consider who and in what situation to do such a gift.
MORE RELATED: Reset All: The Best Striptease Scenes in the Movies
humiliated. It can cause shame, embarrassment if it happens in public, kill holiday mood. Therefore, a woman must find out in advance what will be reaction. If a couple can visit a strip club together and freely discuss such topics, then perhaps the gift will be received positively,” says the head of the psychotherapeutic department of the clinic "Insight" Igor Lyakh (Novosibirsk).
Give a striptease to a boss, colleague or business partner — unacceptable, etiquette specialist Evgenia Skiba (Barnaul) is sure. "In business situations, most people behave with restraint. This is allowed in some creative company. Among people who are merry and jokers in life. They can recognize by behavior, manner brightly, look unusual. They do it themselves such gifts, and appreciate if they are congratulated by a stripper, ”explains expert. Housewives and sportswomen: who learns striptease
Professional dancer and owner of a striptease agency Alexei Zhorkin from his own experience confidently declares that most of the orders are just the same as gifts. Of these, a lot for the boss of any gender. Strippers and strippers are often invited to February 23, March 8, hen parties, stag parties, birthdays, and once, in his memory, they ordered for a wedding.
“There is a negative reaction. The husband begins to be shy, because he does not know how his wife will react if behave uninhibited with the artist. Therefore, we ask that they break through the soil in advance. Or we ask you to leave the room so that they do not embarrass you with your presence. It happens that the people themselves, to whom they give, are asked to stop the dance. This was at a bachelorette party with a very moral bride. In this case, the artist can continue the dance for the public. But more often the reaction is good,” says Zhorkin.
A large proportion of couples believe that the teasing dance able to increase the degree of passion and diversify routine family life. But also here experts advise to approach carefully, and take into account the many factors: from the situation, the occasion to the current state of the relationship. The last one is perhaps the most important.
“There are troubles in family relationships — routine, ritual, adaptation. When a married couple begins to limit fantasies about each other, then such an important part of sexuality as flirting disappears. Many industries exist for due to the fact that this flirting is provided, for example, by Internet dating. That's why many women at one time were so carried away by half-dance that in their relationship novelty, mystery appeared, things connected with fantasy appeared. Usually it strengthens the couple, ”Lyakh believes.
RELATED: How and how much do strippers earn? Life after cheating: return and return
If there is still a relationship flirting, then the reaction to the striptease of the wife or girl is likely to be positive, and she will achieve the desired effect. And if such an important component is no longer there, a woman runs the risk of causing discontent or other negative emotions that before this was restrained, the psychologist warns.
As strip dance choreographer Marina Ignatenko said, most often women apply for lessons when they find out that a man is looking “on the side” or go to strip bars. And then, having learned the strip, they draw attention to myself.
“A woman becomes more self-confident, her gait becomes more graceful. A woman begins to change from the inside, they begin to look at her differently, her man feels it, thinks what has changed in her and thinks about her, the choreographer says.
If you want to dance a striptease, she advises you to take at least a few lessons dancers to master the basic set of movements, and then act with an eye on their own opportunities and benefits. So, if a girl has flexibility, then be sure use twine and braces. And if a woman has long beautiful hair, then dance it out.
In general, the basic set of strip dance elements is simple - "kitty", backbends, stretching, half twine (twine for those who can afford it), half-bridge, touching yourself. Basically, almost anyone can do it.
But we must remember that home striptease is a small show, therefore, appropriate attire is important (you can buy a role-playing costume in a sex shop or just put on a beautiful set of underwear and stockings), manicure, pedicure, makeup, hairstyle.
Especially for Sibnet.ru readers, the choreographer told how to prepare for home striptease on her own, and showed the basic movements. We start with a warm-up and train plasticity.
According to Ignatenko, striptease is impossible without heels. Ideally, you need to stand on strips - shoes with a platform that professional women use. If there are no similar shoes and you don’t want to buy specially, you can do without a platform, but heels are required, and as high as possible.
At home, there is usually no stage or pole. But there are always walls and floors, the use of which will also help to hide the lack of physical fitness. A well-warmed body, practiced movements and personal imagination are the main components of a beautiful home dance.
The choreographer advises to rehearse several times even the simplest dance. And it's not just about memorizing movements. It should be seen that the dance is easy, and it is important that during the striptease the face does not look tense and concentrated. It should be, at a minimum, relaxed, and as a maximum, participate in the image.
For home decor, a chair can be used in addition to the walls and floor. Ignatenko demonstrated how this piece of furniture can help to undress beautifully.
As for striptease music, you need to choose the one that you want to move smoothly. There are many options on the Internet, but According to the Yandex.Music service, the top 10 sexiest tracks include following tracks:
- BlackVelvetOriginal Rerecord - Alannah Myles
- SexualHealing - Marvin Gaye
- Trouble - Elvis Presley
- Stop-Sam Brown
- Yes Boss — Hess Is More, Bang Chau
- You KnowI'm No Good — Amy Winehouse
- PersonalJesus - Depeche Mode
- Super Freak - Rick James
- You CanLeave Your Hat On - Joe Cocker
- Buttons - The Pussycat Dolls
February 9th is Striptease Day. It was on this day, back in the 19th century, that the Moulin Rouge dancer first undressed on stage during a performance. Despite the fact that the girl caused an uproar and was even fined, this act marked the beginning of a separate dance genre.
How to striptease without looking funny
Night falls and the showgirl from Showgirl wakes up in you. And even before you have time to turn on your common sense, you already say the fatal: “Do you want me to dance a striptease for you?” He, of course, agrees. Let's lower the veil of pity over the end of this scene. It happens that each of us wants to feel like a stripper, perform a lap dance with her boyfriend and get a tip in panties. But how do you strip in a way that's really sexy, not funny (and everyone stays safe)? We share secrets!
Forget the acrobatics!
Pf, you say, it's obvious. And here it is not. You have no idea how many women have been injured by the duende. Bruises, torn ligaments, ankle injuries and even a concussion...
Let's agree: this is not a stage performance, but your goal is not to impress your boyfriend with a triple somersault, but to turn him on. First of all, it concerns stretching. Even if it seems to you that right now you will sit on the twine, this will not happen. Or it will, but it will be the last element that you completed. Yes, we know that when you went to the choreography circle in the third grade, you were the easiest to do the splits. But you're not in third grade, you're not hot and you don't want to risk your ligaments.
The same goes for any jumps (watch your head) and backbends (watch your back). In general, it is better to move more slowly and with a smaller amplitude than to go to the emergency room.
Don't do it without preparation
Any dance, even a house striptease, requires preparation and warming up. It is not necessary to think through the entire dance from the first to the last note, but you must have a concept for the dance.
What you need: the main set of movements you are going to perform, and the order in which they are performed. It is better to rehearse the movements several times so that there are no surprises. At least once, you must run the dance alone in full dress, in order to foresee any accidents. So you will know, for example, that the floor is slippery here, it’s easy to stumble on the edge of the carpet, in this movement your dressing gown clings to the heel, and at this moment you need to be careful not to step on your boyfriend’s foot.
Wear clothes that are easy to take off
A common mistake new strippers make is wearing too many clothes. It seems to them that the longer they take it off, the more the dance will excite the partner's imagination.
And here we run into a problem. Jammed bra hooks are half the trouble, but the need, say, to pull off your jeans while slouching on the floor... Let's call it "death to the sex drive." Briefly about the wardrobe items that should be on you:
- Bra. Ideally, if it has a front clasp, it will be easier to take it off, and it looks more intriguing. In fact, it is the bra that opens up incredible scope for imagination. As additional accessories, you can use a "harness" made of thin leather straps or stickers on the nipples.
- Panties. It all depends on taste and physical data, but, in fact, thongs and tangas do not look as advantageous as you think, especially in some movements. Consider other options: lace shorts, briefs with a corset drawstring, or even panties with a cutout between the legs.
- Stockings. You can supplement them with a belt - it will be more difficult to move with it, but the effect will be stunning.
- Robe. From above you can put on a light silk dressing gown. Probably, it is not necessary to write that it is desirable that this is not the same one in which you lie on the sofa on Saturdays with a cat in one hand and a laptop in the other? And the point is not even the sexuality of a particular thing, but the fact that striptease is a surprise, a surprise, and your partner will see you in something that he has not seen before.
Let's talk about shoes separately.
Put soft heels on your heels
On the one hand, what's a striptease without heels? They outline the foot well, tighten the calves and buttocks, but... click. And if you have linoleum in your room, then they leave depressed points.
Why do we need soft heels? First, if you do not live in a private house, then you most likely have neighbors. You know, nothing destroys romance so much as an angry aunt Valya from the third floor, who presses the bell as if she is squeezing the last drops of conscience out of you.
Secondly, when the dance is performed in a club, it's one thing, there you can hardly hear how you click, but at home the sound will be completely different.
Choose slow music
...and familiar music. You won't like it if the track suddenly stops when you haven't even untied your robe yet.
You must like this music. The ideal time is 2-3 minutes. The composition for 5 minutes will be too long, you will both get tired.
Play with your hair
Think of your hair as another stage prop. We recommend that you pull them into a tight bun before the start of the dance, and then let your hair down. Turn your head, let him touch your curls, tickle his tips. In general, everything is in your hands. And head.
Use props, but not too much
You will need a chair to take off your stockings.