How to dance when making love

7 Ways Dancing Makes You Better in Bed

  • Sex + Dating

By Jacklyn Janeksela

Published on 4/27/2016 at 12:05 AM

Blend Images/Shutterstock

Dance is the drug of ancient gods, giving us the freedom to move, contort, and shape our beautiful bodies. Dance is sex with clothes on. But how can we translate dancing into being a better lover?

Actually, the act of dancing naturally improves your love life without you even having to think about it. Here's how.

Dancing gives you a sense of rhythm

In the bedroom, much like the dance floor, connecting to rhythm elevates participants to a new level. Rhythm comes from nature: our ancestors used rhythm when they involved themselves in ceremonial dances, many of which were connecting to some fertility ritual or marriage arrangement.

Dancing is a way to show a partner a link to something ancestral; carnal, even. Through this incendiary and titillating experience -- showing our rhythm and ability to dance -- we provoke those who watch us. They get to synchronize their natural rhythm with ours. And it's those same dance-floor gyrations we use in the bedroom.

Dancing hides inhibitions way better than alcohol

Loving music and dancing to it are two things we've all done since childhood. Young people innately know to dance when music is playing. And if you've ever studied little kids closely, you know that while they're dancing, they're hardly self-conscious. Children move to music in very organic ways and without much thinking or planning.

Of course, as we move into adulthood we forget the glory of freestyle dancing. Yet dancing without inhibitions sets us free. It releases endorphins, sparks creativity... and all without the side effects of booze. By challenging our inner spirit with youthful intentions, we allow dance moves to influence bedroom maneuvers. Excellent lovers learn to shed their inhibitions and enjoy the act itself.

Dancing invigorates the body with energy

In English we use the term "dead fish" (vaca muerta, or "dead cow" in Spanish) to describe an effortless, lazy approach to lovemaking. This is not acceptable, people! Like exercise in general, dance increases energy levels. Being active begets more activity. That includes the boudoir.

Dancing deep and hard brings the energy of the music into your soul. You can summon that same energy to conjure an unforgettable romp in the hay.

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Dancing builds self-confidence

Moving to music raises hormones that increase our self-confidence. When we choose to be more ourselves, regardless of preconceived notions or judgments of others, we become more attractive to others. And when we are aware of our attractiveness, we notice when we are being watched, studied, or desired. That, in turn, lifts our ego even more.

So dance away. Find a suitable beat and/or some killer dance moves, and let that electricity raise your spirits enough to take on a lover.

Dancing brings out playfulness

Dancing lets us play with sound, movement, and contact. All in all, it's one of the most social arts out there. And if you want to gain some points in the bedroom, take advantage of this!

In dance, we make eye contact, we touch, and we use sound to manipulate our bodies and emotions. This same behavior can be transferred to the bedroom with great ease. Keep things lively by having music playing in the bedroom. Its playful nature will make you a playful partner and encourage you to keep things moving between the sheets.

Dancing allows us to be different than our real selves

In dance, we transform. Wallflowers become vibrant voguers, the timid among us burst from their shells, and the quiet become talented twirlers. Dance propels us into other realms and, in that same sense, can convert us into innovative lovers. By allowing music to be our muse, we can reach new heights in the bedroom.

That sense of dance changing us in the moment and allowing us to take on different personas translates perfectly in the bedroom, summoning limitless possibilities. Role-play, anyone?

Dancing brings out our best

Whether we want to reconnect with ourselves or shed a few pounds, dance offers a solution. Through dance we can learn more about our bodies: how to move them, how to feel comfortable in them, and how to use them in the bedroom. Through dance, we can also eliminate physical and emotional layers we want to remove. Dancing is cathartic and therapeutic.

After a night of dancing, most people feel absolutely euphoric. It's obvious why: dance lets us be who we really want to be. Connecting with our true selves (and our bodies) is not only highly attractive, but it also bolsters our ability to satisfy others and ourselves behind closed doors.

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Jacklyn Janeksela is a freelance writer at Thrillist who is also a poet, painter, and musician; she writes about art @Culture Designers & body image @Witty Bitches. Check out her stuff on Tumblr and Bandcamp.

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How To Dance For Man In The Bedroom Inspired By Ciara

Shamika Sanders

, Managing Editor

Posted May 17, 2013


Shamika Sanders is the managing editor for HelloBeautiful where she carries out a vision to uplift Black women by telling their unique stories. She began working at iOneDigital in 2011 and has penned articles for iOneDigital, Essence, Billboard, and has interviewed celebrities like Oprah, Viola Davis, Denzel Washington, and Regina King. Shamika is a seasoned reporter with over 10 years of experience in digital media. She is the mother of an adorable two-year-old, enjoys spending time with her friends and family, enjoys good music, and good eats. Keep up with her on social media. @shamika_sanders

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Hellobeautiful Featured Video


There’s something so intimate and sexy about dancing for your man. Staring in his eyes while you contort your body in sensual positions always sends shivers down their spine. Ciara has become the poster woman for steamy choreography. Her video “Body Party” is like an instructional for performing the act.

We’ve looked to Cici to help us put together a list of dance moves to incorporate into your next routine! You can find them in her videos “Promise,” “Body Party,” “Love, Sex & Magic,” and “Ride.”

MUST READ: Ciara Releases Risqué ‘Body Party’ Cover & Full Song + 15 Of Her Sexiest GIFS

MUST READ: Ciara’s “Body Party”: 5 Reasons Future Is Winning [PHOTOS]

Like HelloBeautiful on Facebook to stay on top of your favorite black celebrities:


The Body Roll


Create an S-form with your body by rolling it like Ciara in her video “Promise.”

2. The Strip Tease


Tease him with your naked body, but don’t give too much away!

3. Utilitize props


Using a chair in your routine adds variety. Use it to show off the arch in your back. High heels help the legs look elongated.

4. Tricks


Putting things between your legs can be tricky, but this trick by Jamie Lee Curtis (borrowed by CiCi) in “True Lies” is a classic move and will impress him!

5. The Big Reveal


Surprise him and reveal your lingerie underneath your robe.




No dance is complete without the sexy crawl. It ill make him feel dominant!

7. Touch


Don’t be afraid to touch your man during your dance. Get close enough to him and entice him with your girl assets.

8. Use different angles


Ciara had the right idea when she gave Future a different angle of her back then breast.

9. A leg up on the competition


Allow him to feel and explore the length of your body by dancing from the tip of your toes to the reach of your lips!

10. Hip movement


No dance is complete without gyrating hip movement. As R.Kelly would say, “Move ya body like a snake ma!”

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Honey, did I happen to hurt you?

No, why did you decide that?

- You just moved.


Sex is not only relaxation, but also hard work that requires tension of all the muscles of the body. Prostitutes, for example, do not do any exercises, but there are few fat women among them. And all because active sex is better than any exercise. Have you had nights after which in the morning you felt pain in all your muscles, as if after two hours of active training in the gym? If not, I'm really sorry for you, you've never had real sex. Of course, if a woman does not "work" during sex, it is hard for a man to endure all night trying for two. A woman should be able not only to somehow move and periodically try to raise her legs or arch her back, a good lover plays with her whole body during sex, as if dancing with a man. A woman during sex should be beautiful from nails on her hands to seductively curved legs. Let's analyze all the parts of the body in order and try to understand what men like. Take, for example, legs. It would seem that if you shaved them neatly, did a pedicure, what else does a man need? And he needs only one thing - to find ten differences for the better of your legs from the rest and for this to love them, as a part of you. How can you love something that is not unique? Other women also get pedicures and shave their legs after watching ads. Of course, if you compare your well-groomed legs with those that have not been touched by the hand of civilization, you will certainly appear in a winning light. But are there so many women, your potential rivals, who allow themselves to walk with cracked heels and unkempt nails? The thing is that a man remembers not the color of the varnish and the absence of corns. If everything is in order, he believes that it should be so, and pays attention to the soft bend of the instep when you stretch your leg, to the elastic muscles of the lower leg, which tense up in certain poses, to the spread fingers that spread as if by themselves when you experience an orgasm. A man's gaze catches an almost bestial grace that wakes up in a woman during sex. The back arches, the chest protrudes, the head leans back, the hand crumples the sheet, the whole body is directed towards him, trying to clear the way for him to the most intimate and absorb the beloved man deeper. Sex should be beautiful, and in the first place it is the woman who makes it beautiful. Even if your love games are more like wild orgies, they still have to be beautiful, as mating different animals is beautiful in its own way. Where there is beauty, there is no place for vulgarity, and a man with a beautiful woman behaves more gently and tries his best, feeling that he has touched the beautiful.

Sexual and outer beauty are a little different things. Sex is good because it turns flaws in appearance into piquant and exciting virtues for a man. Let's go back to our legs. Men like firm but not skinny buttocks and thighs. It is definitely not necessary to swing these parts of the body in order to emphasize the muscles, and to lose weight so that the thigh is compared with the lower leg, and the butt is inferior in size to the male fist, it is definitely not necessary, not a single man will like it. They are more likely to like curvy girls with a thin waist, lush hips and breasts than "herrings". By the way, if you didn’t know about it yet, in advertisements for “very effective” anti-cellulite drugs, women who haven’t tried their effect on themselves, even flat-chested models, are filmed, but twelve-year-old girls who don’t have a hint of cellulite, because they have not yet formed, did not become women. Adipose tissue in a woman's body is needed, of course, in reasonable quantities, but it is necessary for the normal functioning of the female reproductive system, which is why thin women have problems with the regularity of the menstrual cycle and pregnancy.

Determining whether your thighs and buttocks muscles are in good physical shape is very simple. To do this, when you make love, it is enough to climb up, but not sit in the position of a rider, wrapping your legs around the man’s hips, but squat down, spread your legs wider and try in this position, moving rhythmically, to withstand 2–3 minutes. If after several movements the legs ached and refused to move on, this is no good. You need training, and you can spend them during the same sex sessions. Men really like to look at a woman who “saddles” him with pleasure, and all positions in which a woman is on top perfectly strengthen the muscles of the legs, back and buttocks. The position that I have already talked about is the most effective, but tiring, but it has several advantages: firstly, everything is clearly visible to a man - this is already a big plus, and secondly, you can adjust the depth of penis insertion and speed, which is also Nice. Thirdly, by standing on your whole foot or on your toes, spreading or bringing your knees apart, tilting your torso forward or backward, you can adjust the angle at which the penis enters the vagina, increasing or decreasing stimulation, and also training certain muscle groups that need a "pump".

I learned by chance that sex can be used as exercise when my classmate at the institute told how she had to make love to her husband for a whole month when he broke his leg. Naturally, sex boiled down to the fact that the patient called his wife with plaintive moans, and then drove her to himself with caresses and persuasion, since there was no other way to make love. At first, the unfortunate lover did not really like this alignment: everything hurts, there was no pleasure, but then the wife of a preoccupied disabled person realized that she was in command of the parade, and not a man, and learned, within the framework of one position “a woman from above”, to enjoy herself, bring a man to ecstasy , then exciting him almost to orgasm with a quick jump, then slowing down the pace. For a month of such intensive classes with a “sensitive instructor”, the girl lost three kilograms, pumped up the muscles of her thighs and buttocks and realized how a real lover should behave in bed: not just a woman from above or below, but each time differently, like in a dance , which cannot be the same, as in a game that has more exceptions than rules.

Moving on: with breasts in sex games, everything is quite simple: you have to stick out more of it and rub it against your partner, even if the bra size tends to zero - men are delighted with this. The most effective exercises to strengthen the muscles of the chest (the chest itself cannot be strengthened in any way, only muscles and skin) are push-ups and clenching of the hands at chest level. You need to squeeze your hands like this: you stand in front of the mirror, fold your hands with your palms to each other so that the palms are vertical to the ground, and the forearms are horizontal, and then with effort you press one palm on the other (both at the same time) so that the muscles of the chest tense, and the breasts themselves raised a little. If you do this exercise thirty to fifty times every day, "spaniel ears" will not threaten you even in old age. Strengthens the chest and the whole body by pouring cold water. Make a habit of washing your chest with cold water after taking a bath or shower. From time immemorial, a contrast shower has been considered a rejuvenating remedy, which could only be compared with sauna baths and rubbing with oils.

Now let's move on to the most problematic part of the female body - the tummy. If everything is more or less clear with a big booty - in sex this is more of an advantage than a disadvantage, then with a tummy everything is more complicated. The thing is that a man perceives a woman with a tummy as a female fertilized by some male, and does not show sexual interest in her. One way or another, but the stomach must be fought. A good mistress may have a couple of mouth-watering folds at the waist, but not a nasty "mommy" hanging from the navel and below. Getting rid of the tummy is much more difficult than not getting it at all. As soon as you notice that in profile the figure has become rounded not only at chest level, urgently take action - the tummy is coming. I'll tell you another secret: the presence of a tummy suggests that a woman does not make love very often and leads a sedentary lifestyle in an embrace with a box of cakes. Even if a bitch has a bulge in place of her belly, this is not an ugly roller, but a spicy “kissing place”, reinforced from below by muscles and not creeping out to the waist on the sides. This is the tummy that many men like.

Do you remember the oriental beauties who seduce men with belly dancing? Learning to dance like them is not so difficult, for this you need to feel the abdominal muscles and adapt to control them, but shouldn’t a woman born for love be able to do the same? Belly dancing is not only beautiful, but also very useful. The movement of the muscles causes blood flow to the internal organs, resulting in an internal massage, comparable in effectiveness to all methods of cleansing the body. The work of the muscles warms up all the internal organs well, preparing the woman for sex, and along the way, it also develops the muscles of the vagina. I suggest you try to learn the basics of oriental dance, which, by the way, is very similar to the movements of a woman during intercourse.

Belly dancing is built on alternating tension of the muscles of the pelvis, abs and diaphragm (I advise you to repeat the course of anatomy and see where they are), so the first thing we will learn is to tense and relax the muscles. Put on a cassette with oriental music, stand in front of a mirror, put your feet shoulder-width apart, spread your arms to the sides. Dressing in something oriental is very good for doing exercises, even if it is a T-shirt cut off under the bust and sweatpants gathered at the ankles and lowered at the waist. Start swinging to the beat of the music with your eyes closed until you feel the rhythm, then concentrate on the abdominal muscles and try to completely relax them, “letting go” of the stomach and not trying to look more slender and toned. You don’t need to slouch either, just, wriggling rhythmically, alternately relax and tighten, as far as possible, the abdominal muscles. Try to keep your stomach pulled in for as long as you can, it develops muscles well and is much less tiring than leg and torso raises, although if your muscles are frankly weak, you can’t do without standard exercises - how to manage what is almost non-existent? Try to breathe evenly while doing the exercises. At first, it is difficult to even out the breath, as you are used to the muscles moving when you breathe. You have to separate these processes so as not to suffocate during the dance.

The inner muscles are a little harder to feel and train. For example, the diaphragm, which is also involved in the "rolling of the stomach", is easiest to feel by breathing with your mouth open "dog" - quickly, quickly. Can you feel your inner muscles move? Another way is to bend hard and try to move the internal muscles. With the correct exercise, the muscles of the press and back practically do not strain. As soon as you feel exactly where the diaphragm is, and you can draw it in at least a little, let me congratulate you - you have passed the most difficult stage in learning to roll your stomach. Train your diaphragm further, the more often the better. For example, at work or sitting in the car. Don't forget about normal breathing. The next stage is the ability to separately control the muscles of the upper and lower press, so that, by alternately tensing and relaxing them, create the impression of rolling the abdomen. To the same slow music, warm up the abdominal muscles, pulling them in as much as you can and relaxing, and then try, relaxing the diaphragm, tighten the muscles of the lower press, and then, on the contrary, tighten the diaphragm and relax the muscles of the lower press. I warn you right away that nothing will work the first time - it's difficult, but after you can perform this exercise, you can try to dance with your belly, rolling your muscles, as real dancers do. Try to help yourself with your hands, as if feeling for the muscles that need to be relaxed and tightened, but without pressing on them. Stand in front of a mirror and alternately relax and tense your muscles so that a wave runs through your stomach. A few weeks of training, and it will not be difficult for you to roll your abdominal muscles, “wobbling” your booty in different directions, moving your arms beautifully and breathing evenly. If it is not possible to individually cause tension in different muscle groups and relax them in time, try doing the exercises lying down, making sure that the back muscles do not tense up. Another way is to train in a bath filled with warm water, in a sauna, swimming pool, in the morning in bed, that is, in any place where it is easier for you to relax your muscles and feel them separately. And now the most important thing. Do you think you need to learn to roll your stomach in order to arrange incendiary oriental dances? Nothing of the kind, discos are in the tenth place, and our task is to seduce men. Now, try doing a belly roll when you're making love. Yes, yes, you heard right, the thought came to my mind long ago that belly dancing is nothing but a means of seduction and self-promotion of beautiful concubines, yearning without male affection in a harem. The dance was supposed to show how good a woman is in bed, how she can play with her whole body, squirm, give a man pleasure. Now imagine the sensations of a man who enjoys not only the reciprocating movements of the penis, but also from the sweet waves that come from nowhere, rolling when the penis is in the woman.

Now two words about hands. After all, we agreed that everything should be beautiful and harmonious, but what kind of harmony can we talk about if a woman does not know where to put her hands? To begin with, you have to get rid of the worker-peasant setting of fingers. To do this, constantly make sure that your fingers do not “hook”, folding in a ladle, as if you are constantly in full readiness to pick up bags or rakes. Your hands, like the hands of a pianist, should be beautiful, lively, mobile. I'll show you some exercises that will help you get a man turned on just by the sight of your hands, not to mention touch.

1. Try to bend your palm with your fingers straight so that you get an obtuse angle on the back of your hand. If that doesn't work, help your hand "open" by arching it, resting it against the table, or helping your other hand to bend your fingers as far as you can.

2. Put your fingers together and straighten them, and now try, holding your little finger and ring finger together, tear them away from the others, then bring them closer and tear them off again, the sooner the better. Do the same with the little finger and index finger separately.

3. Put your elbow on the table, limply drop your hand so that it hangs, and now with the help of your other hand try to pull your thumb up, pressing it from the inside, to your forearm.

4. Put your hand on the table, as in school, as if you are raising it, asking for the blackboard. Tighten all the muscles of the hand, even the fingers should be tense. Now try to bend your fingers (all together), but not in the way we used to bend them, but only the upper phalanx. Do not relax the brush, otherwise nothing will work. Practice doing this exercise so that your fingers bend and unbend quickly and without titanic effort.

5. Learn to type quickly with all your fingers on a computer keyboard.

In addition, you have a little job of observing your own hands in front of a mirror. Here they are fixing their hair - very much nothing, but they are holding the cup somehow awkwardly, they should have practiced, and for some reason they are pulling at their clothes - they need to be rid of this bad habit. Thus, you will teach your hands to do everything beautifully. Do you know, for example, that they drink cognac by passing the stem of the glass between the index and middle fingers, as if holding the glass in the palm of your hand, and if you decide to drink beer directly from the bottle at a picnic, then you need to keep it closer to the neck so as not to be similar to alcoholic aunts? Your hands have a lot to learn. Try to stroke your thigh, moving from top to bottom, spreading your fingers, now bring them together again, moving from bottom to top. In the same way, you will caress a man, stroking him with your fingertips, slightly scratching. Imagine that a man is a complex musical instrument with keys and strings that you have to find and learn how to play. As in the science of playing any musical instrument, at first it will be difficult for you, but then enchanting music will flow - the music of love that you will give yourself and him, in which you will bathe like in warm milk, moving in the same rhythm. Imagine that the man who sets the rhythm is the drums or bass instruments of your small orchestra, and you have to fill the rhythm with a beautiful melody, playing with your body and including the man in the game. Now you understand what real sex is, from which a man becomes not his own? Only in this way can you cause sexual addiction in a partner, which will develop into love, throw all rivals back three bodies, make you a real priestess of love, drawing her strength in a love dance. I will teach you some exercises that will help you dance in bed so that after the first night a man realizes that he has only dealt with pale copies of a Real Woman before.

The first thing you have to learn is to feel the rhythm and even fall into a kind of trance during lovemaking. And in dancing, and in sex, the sense of rhythm plays a huge role. If nature has not endowed you with suitable grace and the ability to move easily and plastically, I can only advise you to take up dancing and liberate your body, because most women are terribly clamped not only in sex and dance, this can be seen from their gait, movements, facial expressions. Someone manages to relax a little after a glass or two of strong drink, but is that right? So you can become an alcoholic. For example, when I want to relax, I just dance if I'm at home, or for ten to fifteen minutes I "spread like a jellyfish" in an armchair at work, first tensing all the muscles, and then giving them the order to relax. Learn to listen to your body. He wants to stretch - stretch, he wants to dance - dance, run and jump on the grass, not being afraid to look like a fool, put your feet on the table if you are sure that no one will disturb you. The human body is a complex system that works perfectly on its own. And we only interfere with her, put psychological blocks, forcing her to eat according to the schedule, when she doesn’t feel like it at all, stuffing her with “healthy” products, tormenting her with excessive exercises and extracurricular work. As a result, the body goes wrong, gets clogged, gets sick and is not friendly with the head, therefore, when you go to bed with a man and want to relax, he does not want to relax, and as a result, a man sees not a beautiful lover, liberated in body and soul, but a complex and a squeezed woman with hooked arms and no better legs.

Dancing is a great way to get in touch with your body, lose extra pounds without much effort, become graceful and plastic, feel strong and young. Dance is a whole language that will tell a man more than any words and feigned coquetry. He distracts a man from everyday worries, attracting attention only to you, reveals a woman to a man. Remember, everything that a woman does must be filled with beauty, otherwise she ceases to be a woman, and therefore, desirable for a man. If you can’t dance, don’t dance, if you can’t sing, don’t sing, and even better, learn to sing and dance, because each acquired skill leaves behind a crowd of sweet-voiced and gracefully moving potential rivals, lights up a woman’s eyes with awareness of power over a man. If your figure is far from model ideals, this is not a minus, but a big plus that will make you stand out at any party. A graceful plump woman exudes sexual energy. If she does not bounce like a ball, shaking her folds, but gracefully moves, using her hands, exposing her full breasts and hips, this is an amazingly sexy sight. I have seen dancers with full but firm bodies doing belly dance and Indian style dances in such a way that men went crazy with desire, and yet these women did not show striptease, did not throw bras into the hall, did not shake their breasts and did not hang on the poles. This only confirms that a man is attracted by the inner and outer beauty of a woman, and only if it is not there - vulgarity and rough physiology, beautifully and from all angles presented in "porn". I advise you to learn how to dance and control your body in bed. I think it's almost the same. I offer my set of universal exercises that will help you to be at your best both on the dance floor and in the arms of your beloved man.

1. Put on a cassette with music that makes everything inside you dance. It doesn't matter at all whether it will be oriental slow music or the tunes of Verka Serduchka - the main thing is that you like it. Dance in front of a mirror, analyzing your movements. As soon as you notice an unsuccessful move, remember it and do not repeat it again, and vice versa, by experimenting, calculate the most winning moves and use them more often.

2. Train yourself to get ready for work and clean the apartment, dancing a little to the music.

3. While watching TV, watch singers and professional dancers dance, learn from them the simplest but most effective movements and immediately try to repeat them in front of a mirror.

4. When going to a dance party, do not wear a tight skirt and stilettos, I have not yet seen a woman who would dance gracefully in such an outfit.

5. Imagine that each song is a mini-performance with you in the lead role. Here you are openly seducing someone, but you are a modest girl, coquettishly throwing glances at some kind of man you like, in the next song you are a gangster stalker or a cowboy's girlfriend. As part of the game, you can afford a lot of movements, maybe not quite danceable, but against the general background, they look very harmonious. Include facial expressions in the dance, play with other dancers.

6. In the evening, in the light of candles, try to dance alone with yourself, completely naked, some very ancient and very sexy dance. Our distant ancestors did not learn to dance. Under the battle of tom-toms, they surrendered to the power of their body, freeing it from tension and negative energy. For better getting used to the image of an ancient shaman, buy a cassette with rhythmic ethnic music, put on necklaces and bracelets, draw yourself "Indian eyes", smear your body with oil.

7. A lover of any size should be as flexible as a cat. The simplest and most effective exercise is the “drawing” of the figure eight with the hips. In a horizontal plane, you draw a figure eight with your hips, trying to maximize the range of motion (shoulders are motionless), the figure eight can be lateral or frontal. With the frontal, the hips move forward and outward, and then back, and with the lateral - to the sides. You can try moving your hips up and down, squeezing and releasing your stomach. The next exercise is lunges with the hips forward, backward and to the sides, as well as circular movements of the hips, in which the legs do not bend and the shoulders do not move. These movements can be included in the dance.

8. Learn to dance without moving your feet while standing still. The most spectacular movement that can be included in slow oriental dances is the wave. You can make a wave with your hands, if you spread them to the sides with your palms down. The principle of the wave is very simple. Draw a wave on paper and hang it on the mirror in front of which you will perform the exercise. If one shoulder is down, the other should be up. Imagine an athlete who rolls the ball over his shoulders, and it will become clear to you what the movement should be. You can accelerate the pace only after the movement begins to turn out.

9. Be sure to buy a hoop, preferably aluminum, and train with it as often as possible - it will replace you with a bunch of exercises that are usually recommended to keep your waist slim, strengthen your back muscles and abs. When you feel that it has become easy to twist the hoop, ask someone to drill a hole in it, pour sand inside and fill the hole with plasticine. The weighted hoop increases the effectiveness of the exercises. A skipping rope is perfect for training legs and arms; 200-300 jumps every morning and you're in great physical shape - fast and not tiring at all.

10. To make the chest and shoulders move during the dance, learn to make a wave. To do this, stand sideways to the mirror, and now imagine that you have a crossbar at the level of your forehead, under which you need to “dive” without moving. We begin to “dive” - first with the head, then the chest, stomach, hips protrude in turn, the knees slightly bend, the heels come off the floor. Another exercise is the protrusion of the chest. First, you bend forward as much as possible, and then slowly make a circle with your chest, filling it back and returning it to its place. Do you feel the bones crunch?

11. Do you want to feel like a real priestess of an ancient Indian temple? It's very simple. Stand in front of a mirror with your legs wide apart, bend them at the knees, spread your toes apart. Turn your hands palms up and bend at the elbows. Without changing position, do several lunges with your head forward, and then to the sides, without turning or tilting your head. In the same position, lift one leg off the ground and bring it closer, holding it in weight, to the second leg, return to the starting position. After ten such exercises, your muscles will ache, as after a half-hour session of gymnastics. Now do you understand why Indian women were curvy, downed and strong? Another element of Indian dance is the swallow. You probably know how to do a swallow, but after you have taken your leg back and straightened your body, try to bend the leg on which you are standing slightly (or strongly, if possible), bend the leg laid back too, bend the body back, as far as it Maybe. Repeat the same with the second leg. Hands - in any position convenient for you. You can come up with other "Indian" movements yourself if you follow simple rules:

- legs in Indian dance are almost always slightly bent and separated;

- legs and arms should move synchronously, and not in turn;

- after each movement the dancer freezes for a second, as if letting everyone admire the beauty of this moment of the dance;

- many movements are based on the dancer's crouching on one or the other leg, as well as on a beautiful raising of her legs with outstretched or raised toes;

- the transition of hands from one position to another is carried out more abruptly than in Arabic dances, without characteristic wave-like movements of the body and hands.

In order to describe all these exercises, so that you understand: a woman is not made by morning exercises and shaping (although they will not interfere), but gymnastics of the whole body, aimed at developing sensuality, flexibility, such gymnastics affects not only the muscle layer, but also internal organs. Believe me, doing it is much more fun than jumping in front of the screen, repeating the movements of some model or actress. A woman dancing in the rays of the morning sun looks more attractive to a man than a “girl with dumbbells”, puffing from unbearable weight and angry at the whole world for keeping herself in shape, torturing her body with unbearable workouts. My secret to a slim figure is simple: walk more, forget about elevators, dance more and make love!

This text is an introductory fragment.

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Sex columnist ELLE knows: what a man on the dance floor is like in bed

Love and sex

Is dancing about sex? Is it possible to judge what kind of person is in love by the way he dances?

I can, yes, there is proof. My friend and I were all laughing, as our friend is dressing up on the dance floor: straight machine, no plasticity - purely insane energy, and exactly the same thing happened in sex - only horizontally. Tra-ta-ta, tra-ta-ta, the bed creaks and sways, and you seem to be at a training session with a flayer trainer. You lose calories to the maximum, you get pleasure - to a minimum.

“There was no sex” in the USSR. Officially. Well, that is, there was no sexuality anywhere. Therefore, all the men excitedly watched the terrible ballet of the GDR. Vigorous wringing of hands, wringing of legs. Sensuality is hardly more than that of a sewing machine. Everything is nervous. Even cartoonish. Maybe it was all on purpose then - an attempt to "ennoble" modern dance in the Soviet manner, to remove emotions from it. Here, after all, all feelings are about the body, that is, about sensuality, that is, about sexuality.

Dancer - he shows different passions. And in a good scenario, the dance becomes an allegory of sexuality. If it's bad, go to the gym.

We either had a bad hand or classical ballet. Moreover, the ballerinas, for all their classical restraint, had much more emotions - that's why the Soviet bosses loved to whip the ballerinas so much.

African Americans or African Europeans some time ago were offended if people said: "Plasticity is innate in them." Well, ok, not exactly innate. It's just that in Africa they dance about 24/7.

A friend married a Nigerian and spent half a year there with his family. Dancing every day, from morning to night. At weddings and funerals. Is always. A boombox is placed on an oblique stool - and it begins. Different villages have their own dances, unique ones. Some, for example, have such a specialty - the spine moves like a wave. And it's insanely beautiful. You know, there are legends about the sexual power of Africans - well, that's a lie. They can be as lazy as a simple Russian peasant who has a family with only a sofa. They just have a different attitude towards it.

Another sensuality. Another understanding of the body and sex. Out of habit, European girls are shocked. This is not the stiffness of our guys. It is still customary for us to consider sex as such a contest of masculinity. Aggression, rage, clumsiness. There were no examples, apart from this ill-fated GDR ballet, of what sensuality should look like.

I had a boyfriend who started out as a dancer - modern: hip hop and break dancing. In the club, he started laughing at me. And yes, it was rude, but fair. He danced amazingly. If I tried to jerk very actively, then he didn’t fuss at all - he did everything calmly, but at the same time incredibly cool. He had an interesting dance that immediately attracted attention. Take a closer look: all the people who dance smartly do it very measuredly. The issue is not activity. And in a creative way, in sensuality, in a relationship with your body.

Do this experiment - stop somewhere in a crowded place and see how people walk. You will be horrified. By the way, girls are much better than boys. Someone taught the girls to walk more or less smoothly, keep their backs, be smooth. Men... This is a tragedy. Gait as a diagnosis, honestly. Bodies writhing in agony. The men stagger, they are all crooked (on the move), the bodies are clamped as if under pressure, the legs dangle, the step is hysterical. It gets downright creepy.

Walking is also a dance. You spring from heel to toe, your back is straight, your hips are shush-shush, your hands do not dangle. When you walk well, it's music.

The body feels good in all circumstances. Walking is not a function to get you from A to B, it is a pleasure. Apparently, for many, this is some kind of terrible ordeal, torture.

How do people sit, huh?! Girls again sit better than men. I feel all this, these ordinary phenomena as part of a ballet. The beauty of movement. Grace. Sexuality. For me, what a dance is, what a dinner in a restaurant, in relation to the body - the details of the mosaic. Girls try to sit up straight and not put their faces on the plate. Many men bend into the letter C, muzzles, like dogs, put in a bowl and hastily swallow food. Sad spectacle.

If there is no sensuality in the details, there will be no sensuality in general. That is, in sex. You know, there is a stupid film "The Hitch Method" (in the Russian box office they also dragged in the "Removal Rules"). There, a pickup guru (Will Smith) teaches a newbie how to talk to women. Says: "Show me how you dance." He starts jumping and all that. Will laughs, and then shows how to do it. He raises his elbows slightly and barely stomps from side to side. But it's straight sex.

Perhaps people misinterpret passion. Passion is not about frenzied actions at all, passion can be very calm, but at the same time incredibly exciting. Well, yes, sometimes cool and fast so, furiously. But in general, if a person jumps on you like a rowing machine, then this is not cool at all. Good lovers are not just holes, holes, holes. Just like the dancers. Take a look.

All amazing dances are really slow. Even if they seem fast. It's just how we interpret physical activity. If the pas are apparently complex, we somehow automatically regard this as a powerful activity.

My dancer boyfriend had the same attitude towards sex. Some hysterical passion ridiculed. It's not about sex, it's about showing off. Many girls also think: oh, now I'll show you how in porn. And it's not exciting. Sex parody. In sex with a window dressing, it is difficult - this is not about pleasure, but about self-affirmation, and of a strange kind.

To understand both dance and sex, watch videos of ethnic dances. Those cultures where sex was not forbidden. African, yes. Try to repeat - and you will understand that there is no despair. There is sensory meditation.

Sex is hedonism. Dancing, in general, is a euphemism for sex. Or foreplay. Bar, club, dancing, sex - this is how it often happens. In general, sex is not something that happens to you so many times a week for so many minutes or hours.

Your sexuality doesn't disappear anywhere. And it either always manifests itself - in the form of other pleasures, or you have problems with it.

Massage is also about sex. The body is constrained, there is not enough physical communication. Well, yes, sometimes a massage is another pleasure. And sometimes - the opportunity at least from time to time to enjoy purely for yourself. For some, sex is pleasure for a partner. And it breaks everything. In the dance, women try to open up. This is not sex - you should not show off in front of a partner. Therefore, women at least somewhere hope to make friends with their bodies. Sometimes successful, sometimes not so good. But they try to feel their body. Men are true to prejudices - a rocking chair, well, or a pool at best. Dancing still seems homosexual to them. Therefore, it is so difficult for our women and men to understand each other in sex.

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